Apologetics

• From Water to Wilderness: My Story of Falling and Finding God Again

  Sep 22, 2025 Gabriel 1 Comments

  When I was baptized, I thought life with God would get easier. I thought peace would fill me every day. I thought I would suddenly become more disciplined, more faithful, more untouchable. I imagined I would walk out of that water as a new person, safe from the struggles that had chased me before.

  But that’s not what happened.

  Right after baptism, I was hit harder than ever. It was like the devil was waiting for me the moment I came out of the water.

  And you know what? That’s not strange. Even Jesus went through it. The Bible says:

  “Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.”
  —Matthew 4:1

  Jesus’ baptism was followed by temptation. Mine was too. I just didn’t see it coming.

   

  Not long after, temptation came in like a flood. Lust filled my mind. I smoked for the first time. I cursed my own life. And in the darkest moments, I even cursed God.

  I couldn’t understand. Why would this happen after I gave my life to Him? I thought baptism was supposed to protect me from this.

  But the Bible says we are in a real fight:

  “We are not fighting against humans. We are fighting against forces and authorities and against rulers of darkness and powers in the spiritual world.”
  —Ephesians 6:12 (CEV)

  I was fighting, but I wasn’t ready. I thought I was strong. I thought I could handle it. But I was weaker than I believed.

  Living in Fear

  My choices started catching up to me. I became afraid, especially for my health. When I went in for a medical checkup, I was sure the results would be bad. I thought my smoking and reckless living had already destroyed me.

  But the results surprised me. They came back better than I expected.

  That moment shook me. I didn’t deserve mercy, but God gave it to me anyway.

  The Bible says:

  “If we are not faithful, He will still be faithful, because He cannot deny who He is.”
  —2 Timothy 2:13 (NCV)

  Even when I turned away from God, He never turned away from me. That truth broke me. Not because I was strong, but because I finally reached the end of myself.

  The Breaking

  Here’s what I learned: sometimes God lets us fall so we can see we can’t do this on our own.

  Before, I was proud. I thought I was a “good man” because I didn’t smoke, didn’t fall into certain sins, and lived clean. But deep inside, my heart was proud. My strength was in myself, not in God.

  Jesus once said:

  “Those who try to hold on to their lives will give up true life. But those who give up their lives for me will hold on to true life.”
  —Matthew 10:39 (NCV)

  I had to lose my idea of strength before I could find real life in Him.

  The Surrender

  I came to the end of myself and finally surrendered. Not with fancy words. Just broken, empty, desperate. I dropped to my knees and gave God everything I had left, which wasn’t much.

  And He met me there.

  Slowly, He began to rebuild me. He didn’t rebuild me with pride or with the false strength of “being good.” He rebuilt me with His grace.

  Paul wrote:

  “But the Lord said to me, ‘My grace is enough for you. When you are weak, my power is made perfect in you.’”
  —2 Corinthians 12:9 (NCV)

  I used to hide my weakness. Now I’ve learned: my weakness is where Christ shows His strength.

   

  Learning God’s Way

  God doesn’t always work the way we expect. I thought He would make me stronger by helping me keep my pride. But He broke that pride, because it was in the way.

  The prophet Jeremiah talks about how God is like a potter:

  “But the jar he was making did not turn out as he had hoped, so the potter crushed it into a lump of clay again and started over.”
  —Jeremiah 18:4 (NLT)

  That was me. I was the broken jar. But God didn’t throw me away. He started over.

  Serving Again

  As I surrendered, God gave me new strength. Not strength to boast, but strength to serve.

  He opened the door for me to work with the youth. I began giving more of myself than ever before. This time it wasn’t about proving I was a “good man.” It was about showing God’s love and giving back what He had given me.

  My life, which felt like it was slipping away, was placed back in His hands. And His hands are safe hands.

  Waiting Through the Storm

  I actually started writing this story a month ago. But every time I tried to finish, something got in the way. Another storm would rise. Another problem would hit.

  Now I understand why. God didn’t want me to write this story halfway through. He wanted me to wait until I could see His work more clearly.

  David wrote in the Psalms:

  “I waited patiently for the Lord. He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of destruction, out of the sticky mud. He set me on a rock. He made my feet steady.”
  —Psalm 40:1–2 (NCV)

  God used the waiting time to shape me, to strengthen me, to remind me He was in control.

  The Victory

  Now I can say this with confidence: the struggle was real, but so is God’s victory.

  I used to think strength meant not smoking, not falling, not slipping up. But true strength is not about what I can do. True strength is found in what God does through me.

  Yes, the devil attacked me hard after my baptism. Yes, I failed. But God’s grace was greater than my failure. His mercy was stronger than my weakness. His love pulled me back even when I pushed Him away.

  The Bible says:

  “My dear children, you belong to God, so you have already defeated these false prophets. This is because the One who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.”
  —1 John 4:4 (NCV)

  That’s the truth I now stand on.

  My Final Words

  If you’ve been baptized and thought your struggles would end, but instead they got worse, you’re not alone. If you’ve fallen harder than ever before after giving your life to Jesus, you’re not the only one.

  Baptism doesn’t end the battle. It declares whose side you’re on. And when you declare for Christ, the enemy takes notice.

  But don’t be afraid. You don’t fight alone. God is with you, and He is greater.

  The struggle is real. The temptations are real. The breaking is real.

  But God’s victory is even more real.

  And that’s the story of my life, broken, rebuilt, and held by His grace.
  
  Love,
  Gabriel.

   

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• Reading the Bible with a Curious Stranger

  Aug 6, 2025 Gabriel 0 Comments

  About 3 days ago, I met a young man from France in my hostel lobby. He was curious, open-minded, searching, eager to understand things beyond what he already knew. What started as a simple conversation turned into something more meaningful, a shared journey through the Bible.

  We began reading together, starting with the Gospel of Matthew. Neither of us were scholars. But both of us were hungry to learn, about God, about faith, about what these ancient texts still say to people today.

  We’ve made it through Matthew chapters 1 to 11 so far. It's been intense. These chapters cover a lot, Jesus’ birth, His baptism, the Sermon on the Mount, miracles, and deep teachings about life, faith, and the Kingdom of Heaven. Every page sparked new questions. Every answer led to more reflection.

  We're both committed to finishing the book of Matthew in the few days we have left. Time is short, but the focus is real. 

  Reading the Bible with someone from a different culture, background, and belief system has opened my eyes in ways I didn’t expect. This wasn't a planned Bible study. It was just two people, drawn together by curiosity, learning side by side.

  That’s the beauty of truth, it meets us wherever we are. Even in a hostel lobby.

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• Baptized in Pattaya: Finding God's Grace in a City of Sin

  Aug 1, 2025 Gabriel 1 Comments

  Pattaya, Thailand, is a city with a reputation. Most people don’t think of God when they hear its name. They think of nightlife, sex tourism, and excess. They call it “Sin City.” But in the middle of that chaos, I experienced something holy. I got baptized.

  Yes — baptized in Pattaya.

  I’ve been a Christian for years. My faith has grown through Bible studies, fellowship, and prayer. But I had never taken the public step of baptism. Not because I didn’t believe. I did. But the timing never felt right. Life kept moving. I kept waiting. And then, God surprised me.

  A Trip That Turned Into a Spiritual Milestone

  When I went to Pattaya, it wasn’t for a baptism. I was there with my Bible friends. We knew about the city's reputation, but we also knew we weren’t going there to join in — we were there to be light. Even still, it felt ironic. This wasn’t the place I imagined making a deep spiritual commitment.

  But God’s ways don’t follow our logic.

  “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. — Isaiah 55:8

  One evening, during our time of fellowship and reflection, the idea of baptism came up. It hit my heart in a different way. There was no pressure. No hype. Just a quiet stirring from the Holy Spirit. I knew it was time.

  Baptism in a Place No One Expects

  We planned it for the beach but eventually did it in a pool. It was simple, honest, and unforgettable. Just a small group of believers, my spiritual family, standing in the middle of a city known for everything but God.

  And yet, God was right there.

  That moment in the water was powerful. Not because of where I was, but because of where I was. The contrast made it even clearer: God's grace doesn’t avoid broken places. It invades them.

  “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” — John 1:5

  That baptism wasn’t just a public declaration of faith. It was a declaration of truth: God is not limited by location. His power reaches anywhere.

  God Doesn’t Wait for Perfect Conditions

  If I’ve learned anything, it’s this, God doesn’t wait for things to be clean, quiet, or convenient. He moves in the mess. He works in unexpected places. He meets people where they are and brings transformation on His terms.

  Pattaya is known for sex tourism, drinking, and parties, and yet, I saw Jesus there. Not just in my baptism, but in the worship we shared, the fellowship we had, the love that surrounded us. God was active in a place most people write off as spiritually dead.

  “Where sin increased, grace increased all the more.” — Romans 5:20

  If that doesn’t humble you, nothing will.

  You Never Know Where God Will Move

  Looking back, I see the beauty in God’s plan. I thought I needed a peaceful retreat or a quiet church altar to take this step. Instead, God chose a place known for everything opposite, and turned it into holy ground.

  Why? Because He can.

  That’s the point of grace. It doesn’t wait. It doesn’t ask for permission. It shows up, even in the heart of darkness, and does what only God can do.

  My baptism in Pattaya taught me something I’ll never forget:

  You never know where God will lead you, or how He’ll work when you get there.

  And maybe that’s exactly how it should be. Because then, it’s undeniably His doing. Not ours.

  “The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going.” — John 3:8

  That’s the Spirit. That’s God.

  And that’s my story.

   

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• A Home for the Rejected-- Our Dream to Help Youth Who Chose Jesus

  Jun 19, 2025 Gabriel 0 Comments

  We are just a few simple people with a big dream.

  We want to build a safe place, a home, for young people who were rejected by their families because they accepted Jesus. These young believers are often left alone, with nowhere to go. Some are scared, hungry, and heartbroken. But even in the pain, they still follow Jesus. That is true faith.

  Right now, we don’t have a shelter yet. We don’t have money or land. But we have something important: faith and a burden in our hearts. We are meeting with churches, talking to believers, sharing the idea with anyone who will listen. Some say it’s too big. But we know God can do big things with small people.

  We see this story in the Bible too.
  Joseph was rejected by his brothers because of his dream, but God had a plan (Genesis 37).
  David was forgotten by his family, but God chose him to be king (1 Samuel 16).
  And Jesus Himself, His own people didn’t accept Him. But He never gave up (John 1:11).

  We believe God is calling us to do something like this. To be a family to those who lost their own. To give food, shelter, love, and hope to the ones who feel alone. Just like Jesus said: “Whatever you did for one of the least of these, you did for me” (Matthew 25:40).

  We don’t know how or when, but we are trusting God step by step. If He wants this to happen, He will open the way.

  This is only the beginning.
  Please pray for us.
  And if God touches your heart, maybe you can help too, Someday soon!
  
  Good bless, 
  Gabriel 

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• From confusion to clarity

  Dec 28, 2024 Gabriel 0 Comments

  It all started with an unexpected request from a friend. She reached out, asking if I could help someone she knew who was in the midst of a financial crisis. The moment I heard about it, my heart stirred. The first thought that came to my mind was, “Let me help.”

  As a writer on facebook, I often get asked for freelance writing opportunities, but most of the time, I’m unable to assist. It’s not that I don’t care, but the circumstances rarely align for me to offer meaningful help. This time, however, was different. There was a call in my heart, a strong urge that I couldn’t ignore. I needed to help this lady, no matter the cost. Why I felt this way, I had no idea.

  I had no freelance work available to give her, but I still wanted to help. After some thought, I asked her, “Would you be interested in writing Bengali articles for our website?” Note: I get some money from you guys and most of it goes for rent and medicine. But still I wanted to share it with her. Why? I don't know.

  I explained that the website she’d be writing for was a Bible-focused platform run by Global Radio Outreach. She was a Muslim lady and agreed to the work, though her enthusiasm was understandably reserved. She admitted she wasn’t excited about learning Christian content, as she had no prior knowledge of the Bible or Christianity. Still, she accepted the challenge.

  To help her get started, I suggested she spend two weeks studying the Bible and familiarizing herself with the basics of Christianity. Surprisingly, she agreed. Over those two weeks, she diligently read and began to develop a good understanding of the material.

  Today, as we discussed her religious thoughts, she opened up about her struggles. She described herself as a confused Muslim who believed in God but felt lost. Her words resonated deeply with me, reminding me of my own journey when I struggled with faith. I saw a reflection of my past in her confusion and search for truth.

  As our conversation deepened, I shared the story from Luke 23:32-43, where Jesus was crucified alongside two thieves. I explained how one of the thieves, despite his sins, acknowledged Jesus and was assured a place in heaven. Her reaction was profound. She was overwhelmed and said, “That should be God. That sounds and feels like God!”

  Her response was genuine and heartfelt. It was a moment of clarity for her, a connection that seemed to spark something deep within. From that moment on, she was ready to take the next step. She officially started writing for AlorDisha.com alongside me from day before yesterday. Her journey with the Bible didn’t stop there; she also expressed her willingness to join the Bible community in our country, a group that operates in secrecy due to the risks involved.

  Reflecting on the beginning of this story, I realize how miraculous the journey has been. I had no prior knowledge about her and certainly didn’t anticipate the risks involved in sharing my faith. Where I live, speaking openly about Christianity can be life-threatening. Yet, I felt compelled to go beyond all risks and financial constraints. I followed my heart, and it led to something extraordinary.

  Today, we have another soul who has embraced the truth of Christ. She has started a new chapter in her life, not just as a writer but as someone who is learning about the love and salvation offered by Yashua. This journey has been a testament to the power of faith, compassion, and courage.

  Thanks to Jesus, another life has been touched and transformed. And as I reflect on this experience, I am reminded that sometimes, all it takes is a simple step of faith to make a profound difference in someone’s life.

  Moral: This story teaches the value of compassion, faith, and courage. It shows that by following the call of our hearts, we can create meaningful change in someone’s life, even when it involves personal risk. Sharing faith with love and understanding can lead to transformation. It emphasizes the importance of stepping out of our comfort zones to help others and trusting in God’s plan. Ultimately, it reminds us that even the smallest acts of kindness can have a lasting, eternal impact.

   

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